You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Randomize
