Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
I like how my motivation to lose weight is so I can wear a nude bikini and get covered in body paint for the tribal party. Priorities.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
I just got called the stable friend. This makes me super uncomfortable
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
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