just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
My mom is holding a picture of me, crying, and saying "where did I go wrong" over and over again.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
