i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
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