So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
You walked in, sat down, looked at the waiter and said, "I'm only having deserts and liquor."
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
Randomize
