The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
I knew how high you were when you put a french fry in your mouth and said 'fuck, this tastes like meat but feels blue.'
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
Randomize
