i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
Randomize