I think scott just propositioned me for sex
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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