none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Friends don't let friends put redi whip in their wine
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize