NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
He pocket texted me while I was blowing him in the car...What are the odds?
Considering how often you blow him,high.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
Randomize
