guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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