at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
I hope I don't have to wait for another triple crown winner to get laid again.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
Randomize
