Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
While at warped tour today a girl was crowd surfing and her vagina landed in my face, I call that a successfull day.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
so i may have indirectly taught my 13 year old campers how to give blowjobs.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
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