I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
