8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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