On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Between my vibrator and my iPhone carpal tunnel is inevitable.
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
that is very illegal...i love you.
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