I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
please remind me of this if i ever start out a night declaring my goal is to see how much american honey it takes for me to forget who i am again
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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