as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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