Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I just told the sun to stop. That hungover.
Mike passed out early so we kept filling his mouth with redi-whip and letting the dog lick it out, but he started getting hives so we stopped.
Woke up in a bathtub with both of my legs broken. How was your night?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Dude. Craziest ride ever. I was convinced that the bus was an airplane. There were clouds when I looked out the window. I got really upset every time the bus turned because airplanes shouldn't turn.
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