I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I sent you a snap of me in the bath, and you sent me a snap of a taco. An actual taco.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
Randomize
