I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I woke up with a bloody knee, 6 burn marks on my thigh and glitter nails If anyone asks I'm going to say You came into town
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
There were 7 of us cowering in the kitchen because you were swinging a giant, pink double headed dildo around like a nunchuk and hitting anyone who came near you with it.
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
Randomize