You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
high people should be assigned attendants
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
I think the Predator is hunting me in my house. If I don't text you later, send Danny Glover. I love you all.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
I'm eating a subway sandwich in the bathtub because I don't want to move. God bless boys from Brooklyn
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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