I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
There was a clear and well defined point last night where I could've decided to go home but no now I've woken up with glitter all over my nuts and potentially an std or 2
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Randomize
