They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
i got us presents. or arrested. we shall see!
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
so i'm with my friends driving on the highway and just saw a guy in the car next to us sucking on a dildo. can't make this shit up.
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
