Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Should I go home with him even though I know my Run DMC undies have skid marks on them?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
Ok so last thing I remember was hugging a cop while vomiting
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Randomize