So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Just realized how many men I've had sex with for the first time in St. Patty's Day past. Currently sending "HAPPY SEXIVERSARY" texts...
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
sorry for showing your butt to the bar
sorry for licking your cheek
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
