You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
Doing blow at 6am to "wake myself up for clinicals" was a baaaaad idea
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I've needed to start drinking protein shakes to keep up with her. It's like my dick just started doing crossfit.
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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