if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I've never used poorer judgment in my life. It's mathematically possible that I impregnated 5 women in the past 24 hours since I won the lottery. But I couldn't be happier about it.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Whoever thought of breakup sex is my new best friend
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize