Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Ever the responsible adult, I just realized that today is the Obamacare deadline, but I'm too high to handle insurance now.
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Randomize
