she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
Dude, I puked in the stall for God knows how long. Halfway through, a kid sits down in the stall next to me and starts jacking off, i heard the porn on his phone and everything. so FYI, the middle stall is where good nights go to die
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
honestly my period and I are just as surprised to see each other every month
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Randomize