You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
