tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
New discovery: conditioner is better for jerking off than baby oil. Fuck yes.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
