it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
After the sixth shot I started to slur my pauses.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
The ecstacy made me so dehydrated I started licking condensation off car windows
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
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