i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
Got baked and laid and ate baked lays when I laid down while baking the brownies I I’m Superman
You’re still high, aren’t you?
Oh yeah
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
