peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
We broke two of his toes while having sex. He laughed said he'd fix it in the morning and kept going. I think I'm in love
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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