dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I just had a flashback to last nights party, I'm pretty sure I told most of the people there that I post a masturbation schedule for an iCal download.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
Randomize
