I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Get out of your relationship and into my pants.
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Randomize
