quit re-tweeting John McCain's tweets
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
ps why does my dog smell like popcorn and a dryer sheet..?
Randomize
