Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
Every concussion has its silver lining
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
Omg, you would have loved the guy I almost hit with my car tonight
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
We just had can't-look-you-in-the-eye sex and it was still surprisingly good
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
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