I'm in that stage of denial where I hope our kids have his nose.
You do realize that you broke up with him, right?
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
He can spot Burberry from half a bar away. He's not into vag
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Randomize
