I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Helped an old lady on crutches throw away her mcdonalds, carried her stuff to the car and helped her get in...most productive cinco de mayo hands down
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize
