Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Also I got A jello shot for $2!!! It's like the forever 21 of bars
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
