I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
I also have a full keg. I'm thinking about crashing a party, they can't get mad if I bring a keg of beer.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
We were having sex and my nose just started pouring blood. He reached down to the floor, grabbed a sock and held it to my nose. He just kept pounding away like nothing was happening.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
Randomize
