no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
The only thing I have to prove last night happened is a fireman's hat full of puke.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Randomize
