If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
The beers last night were like the tears from god
After your flask fell out of your leg brace and you told your RA that it was juice, you tried to unlock your dorm room but your key was attached to your bra so he ended up seeing your boobs
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
