Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Watching her eat just hurts me
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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