I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I'm passing your future prison.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
I just woke up on the floor with an empty handle in one hand and a piece of my ceiling in the other. #classy
Randomize
