i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
its weird that my cat bites every fat chick i bring home. i repeat every fat chick, qhT KINDA FRIEND ARE YOU
You fucked him. I baby bird fed him whiskey . I feel like we've bonded.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Randomize
