it hurts more in the daytime
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
There's a burrito next to my bed. Did you buy it for me or is the Chipotle fairy real? And why am I naked?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
I just woke up and there was a condom wrapper stuck in my hair. This is my life.
Didn't you sleepover at your grandparents?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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