I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
While all of the skanky girls from the crowd got on stage we screamed fair game and scoped out all their boyfriends, she made out with 2, this is what we call taking advantage of the situation
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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