There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
My gynecologist inadvertently complimented your penis.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
I'd just like to take a moment now to apologize sincerely for getting drunk and making an as of myself at your Christmas party next week. I'm especially sorry for sleeping with your baby sister.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
